Sunday, December 14, 2008

Goodbye, Yesterday. Hello, Today and Tomorrow!

Today was a momentous day because I let go of much that I was holding onto that no longer serves me. Much of it was sparked by a feeling I had when I woke up this morning -- an agitation that I was wasting energy on things which no longer feed me and that it was finally time to do something about it. So, I decided to live up to my birth name ("Kelly" means "Warrior" in Gaelic) and be a warrior of the light, recognizing the need for action and having the courage to let go and leap forward into the unknown.

It's a mood I've been in for the last month or so and it involves throwing away, giving away, shredding, purging and releasing old material in order to make room for all which is new. I'm giving away old clothes, throwing away "stuff" which just takes up room, letting go of old friends who have moved on, etc... Essentially, I'm cleansing my space and ridding myself of anything that doesn't resonate with who I am today. And, it's entirely freeing. In fact, I find myself searching around my space to see what else I can release.

This afternoon, I spent several hours with a dear friend chatting about my unfinished Ph.D. and I heard myself say to him, "You know...I really don't want to finish it. The topic doesn't feed me and I'm really not interested in pursuing it any further. I don't want to finish this related article either. In fact, I feel pulled towards other ventures which more deeply resonate with me and bring me greater joy. This only drains me and I feel tense even thinking about it." I paused to sip my coffee and was startled when he burst out laughing, telling me he's waited YEARS for me to say this and that he hoped I would finally let it all go and move on with my life.

He's right. I always know the right course of action but sometimes I put it on the back burner until it feels right (or I feel comfortable enough with the consequences) to do something about it. And when that happens, watch out, world, because I move with lightning speed. Today I came home and PITCHED all my old Ph.D. material, saving only a few things which are of personal interest to me.

I know that this action was right because I feel so light when I think about it. I feel good. In honoring my inner feelings about the unfinished Ph.D., I am better positioned to honor truths in other areas of my life. And I cannot wait to see what comes my way from adopting more of a downstream approach to life. My hunch is that I'll be exactly where I need to be, surrounded by people I'll need to know in order to do all that which will come next.

How incredibly exciting!

2 comments:

Maringouin said...

Well done, Warrior Woman!

Kelly McGannon said...

Thanks, Margaret! Looking forward to what is next!