Alpha Male in the Headlights

he wrote her to tell
her that his most recent date
was an utter fiasco.

"she was cute as a button
but MEAN," he confided.
"i'm experiencing post-status fall...fell.
help."

"sounds like little kitty had claws, man"
she replied.
"i'm so sorry."

"emotions, like inflammation and trains,
cannot be stopped on a dime,"
he said.

"i've just got a weak spot for girls who
have spark and dig the outdoors.

"all higher order processing just stops
and i'm like a deer in headlights.
serves me right for not asserting
alpha status with her sooner," he added.

even though he couldn't hear her
she nodded in sympathy but knew
that even a declaration of alpha status wouldn't
protect him from the headlight effect.

she just hoped he'd discover the difference
between a mack truck and
a tandem mountain bike.